Mirror's edge

We mirror each other now.
Yet somehow, we don't.
Facing each other, there are
similarities; yet, many differences.
But as she succinctly noted,
we are the puzzle pieces that fit.
Together.

And like her,
I, too, share a certain fear.
A fear of measuring up.
Of maintaining some semblance of
balance between the forces and
elements in our new and as yet
precarious world.
It's a work in progress.
My hopes are that we remain
harmonious, humble in our attempt
at making things work.

Still, the fear remains.
A tinge of apprehensiveness;
of making mistakes, of offense.
Unintentional, and hopefully, never
otherwise.

Yet, I am hopeful.
We are headstrong.
She knows what she wants.
I know what we want.
We know what we want.
And we want this.
We want it to work.
Coz we want this.

Flaws

I have my share.
Who doesn't.
But, never mind
the rest.
This is about moi.
My fault?
In so many words..

I'm a spoiler.

I lavish my lady love
with stuff.
Which shouldn't be.
Or should it?
Who knows?
But, I'm like that.
I have been, ever since.
And, it's spelled disaster.

Could it be more than
just spoiling?
Could it be I'm too much of a..
nice guy?

Is there such a thing as
being a too-nice guy??
I'm not lifting my own bench here,
I'm not trying to boast;
just calling it as it is.
Not that it's a good thing;
I think it is, and
at the same time, it isn't.

Perhaps I should balance it out.
Easier said than done.
Coz when I fall for someone,
I fall hard.
And all of a sudden,
I go out of my way to do
nice things for this someone.
Excuse me..
special someone.
Then, the cycle begins.
Caught up in the rapture.
The throes of passion.
But, I'm getting ahead of myself.

Methinks, I should rethink.
Though I know it's gonna be hard,
a modicum of caution is in order.
Coz I threw caution to the wind..
but sensibility shouldn't
go along with it.

It's hard.
But I'll try.

A song

It's not just a song.
It's possibly the song.

There are countless other songs I can think of, that have
mattered over the years; with landmark events that bolstered
their significance.

Yet, this one, like most unexpected occurences,
good things included, happen to pop up, literally out-of-the-blue.

As random as it cued itself in my music player one fine day,
the message hit home, somehow.
And helped this careening cynic
fall off the edge..
and into the deep end.

Willingly.

Thanks, Bob.

You are here and warm
But I could look away
And you'd be gone
Coz we live in a time
When meaning falls in splinters
from our lives
And that's why I've travelled far
Coz I come so together
Where you are

You are here today
But easily
you might just slip away
Coz we live in a time
Where paintings
have no color
Words don't rhyme
And that's why I've travelled far
Coz I come so together
Where you are

Yes, and all of things I said
that I wanted
Come rushing by in my head
when I'm with you
Fourteen joys
and a will to be merry
All of the things
that we say are very

Sentimental gentle wind
Blowing through my life again

Sentimental lady
Gentle one

Speechless..

No two words strung together can possibly
explain just how I feel right now..
But let's give it a try..
Uhm..

Nervous excitement..
(A bit, maybe)

Butterfly attack..
(Hmm perhaps)

Deep end..
(Getting warmer)

In love..
That's better.

So much so, that I've almost
(almost, but not quite)
forgotten just how good it feels.

Thanks, love.

Bow

Had this happened sometime
last year, throwing a hissy fit
as such, I would have dismissed
this, and made, as she likes to
say, an early retreat.

Could it be because I get it, now?
Or should I say.. I get her, now.
I did tell her once that..
< and I quote myself here >
".. what were once complaints,
are now compliments.."

I thank you.

< bow >
< exit stage left >

But, y'know..

.. at the end of the day,
you just miss me.




.. just like
I miss you.

But..

.. should indifference
be your weapon of choice,
then..

There's..

..no cookie cutter..
..no third (nor fourth, et.al.) party
..no "miss you love.."

There's just an imperfect me..
..and an imperfect you.
Flaws, faults and all.
As is.

Who's to say that
these so-called "imperfections.."
are what make us
perfect for each other.

This push n' pull..

.. now that's tiring.
One minute, it's this.
In another, it's that.

Mixed signals..

Then, there's the
unfounded jealousy
that needlessly seeps in,
leaving unnecessary dents;
avoidable chinks in the armor.

You say..
I don't know what I want.
Do you know what you want?

I'm this close..

.. to throwing
caution to the wind.
This close.

The "Scorpion" rising

Whoa!
Spidey's old nemesis,
well, one of them, is back!
Harking back to the days
of my youth, this conjures
memories of the old 60's
Spider-Man series; my old
(by now classic, had they
survived) comic books and
my attempts at drawing.

Today, "the Scorpion"
takes on a whole new meaning.
Of being stung..
and in its clutches.
Haplessly helpless.
Venom poring through
my veins, toxified,
and intoxicated.

And ironically..
loving it.



Sidebar:
On a bus ride earlier
this week, a typically
insipid teleseries on an
equally insipid local TV
channel gave me the chuckles.
A tale of a beautiful girl
who brandishes a
deadly secret,
and a venomous tail.
Her name..

Alakdana.

Wahahahahaha!

An omen, perhaps..??

It's important to me..

There're songs that you
used to love dearly.
But as time passed, you
fell out of love with them.
There're songs that you
used to loathesomely hate.
But as time passed, you
began to appreciate them.

Then..
there're the songs you
used to love dearly,
and as time passes,
you love even more dearly.

Songs that you didn't quite
get when you first heard.
< scratch that >
Not that you didn't "get" it,
but it takes on
a whole new meaning.
As if, a life of its own.
Suddenly, the words begin to
make perfect sense.

You finally get it.

Timeless.
Immortal.
Rundgren.

It's important to me..



Lyrics | Todd Rundgren - Hello It’s Me lyrics

What if ..

I remember an old friend told me once,
while we discussed the merits of a prospective
career move, she said to me "You don't take risks."
And rightfully so.
Rightfully, because I'm the sureshot artist.
Sigurista.
I'll go for the sure thing.
If it has even the most miniscule
evidence of uncertainty, a shadow of doubt,
so to speak.. then forget it.
It's not worth the risk.

What is worth the risk?
Much has been lost because of risk.
It's hit and miss.
Touch and go.
They say..
life is the same.
And you've never truly lived,
unless you've risked.
I, for one, do not prescribe
to this notion.

Until now.

Maybe it's about time.
I begin living.
And take a risk.

Soulmate

I have.. a soulmate??
Hmmmm..

Off-Air

I've been away for so long,
I can't remember how long it's been.
Let's see.
Okay, it's been fifteen months, a little
over a year, since I've been off-air.
Has it been that long? I hardly noticed.
A lot has changed, since then.
And I'm not just talking about the very
face, facade, and faculties of Radio;
but also the very
face, facade, and faculties of me.
Radio has changed, and so have I.
Surprising, shocking even, as it may seem;
but I don't miss it.
Back in the day, I would never imagine
myself uttering such sacrilege.
Here and now, I'm singing a different tune.
It's just the way it is.
So, it's funny to know that some people
actually think I still want to get back
on-air.
Numerous occasions have lended themselves
to this fallacy school of thought.
May I just reiterate..
I am off-air, and it shall remain as such.
Get it through your thick skull, moron..

Once, a mere chide on someone was taken with a serious
dose of salt. The ulterior motive behind the
swipe was to elicit a reaction; and elicit, it did.
So much so, that the person in question, as well as
his comrades, took it as a serious query.
Much to my amusement.
Seriously, methinks I've passed the torch.
To whom.. the hell should I know.
Radio ain't the Radio I once knew.
It's an entirely different mutation.
But.. that's another story.

I'm a Virgo, too

I believe
that when the hurting
and the pain has gone
We will be strong,
Oh yes we will be strong
Yeah!
And I believe that if I'm crying
while I write these words
Is it absurd ?
Or am I being real
I believe that if you knew
just what these tears were for
They would just pour like every drop of rain
That's why I believe
it is too late for anyone to believe

I believe
that if you thought for a moment,
took your time
You would not resign yourself,
resign yourself to your fate
No, no, no, no, no, no ,no.
And I believe
that if it's written in the stars,
that's fine
I can't deny that I'm a Virgo too
I believe that if you're bristling
while you hear this song
I could be wrong or have I hit a nerve ?
That's why I believe
it is too late for anyone to believe

I believe
that maybe somewhere in the darkness
In the nighttime,
In the storm
In the casino
Casino spanish eyes
And I believe,
no I can't believe
that every time you hear a new born scream
You just can't see the shaping of a life
The shaping of a life
It's too late baby, now
It's too late baby
Yeah!

What resolutions??

It's the New Year.
SSDY.
Hopefully lesser hard times,
more good or at the very least,
easier times.
And with every new leaf,
the proverbial, much-cliched
"resolutions" are not far behind.
Resolutions?
What resolutions??
Must we wait for the new year
to change?
Of course not.
We can change any damn time
we want.
Any which way we please.
Why wait?
Change is good.
Change is now.